One day I stepped on the scale and panicked because I had gained 15 pounds. Gaining weight is something that happens to a lot of American bodies, but I always assumed my metabolism would triumph over every single carb and sugar I mercilessly shoved in my body. Nope, bodies change and sometimes that means extra fluff. “I will eat better and lose this weight in no time” I thought ignorantly. But the mouth attached to my body never stopped eating the cookies. Every time I came face-to-face with a pastry or sugary coffee drink I thought, “Do I want to eat this or be skinny?” Nine times out of ten I chose to eat the damn cookies and drink the frappuchinos because deep down in my soul I didn’t give a rat’s ass about being skinny. The pressure and guilt I felt came from Pinterest pictures of slim gorgeous girls wearing outfits that cost half of my paycheck but I’ll be darned if all those waists aren’t teeny tiny.

Becoming healthy should not be about being apart of yet another fucked up beauty pageant.

When I began my journey to a healthy style and made it about feeling good, having more energy and trying to decrease my feelings of depression I found motivation and a level of self-control I had never experienced before. I’m not down to what I originally thought was going to be my target weight but it’s not about a number anymore. I feel energized, happier and I’m saving money not eating out every day.

I’m not an expert on nutrition or fitness, I just want a piece of the Internet to celebrate with you when you choose grilled chicken instead of fried, relate to your hatred of exercise, and not give you a judgmental eye when you eat a donut. But I might have eaten them all before you could get to them. Sorry.